Friday, March 23, 2012

Spiritual Formation 101 – How Can Something So Good Turn Out To Be So Bad?

I stand there looking at him as if for the first time. I wonder how in the world did I find myself in this place. What started as seemingly innocuous decision to participate with millions of others in Lental fast by abstaining from whining, which I really believed was better suited for my children then me, snowballed into this colossal mess where my yard looks like a rabid squirrel habitat, our property is exuding manure smell in the 10 mile radius, and I am faced with a guy who doesn’t even apologize for calling me independent (as if there is something wrong with it), opinionated, controlling, disrespectful, perpetually whining workaholic. What is he thinking?!!! How’s this going to look on my performance review?!!! And as if that is not enough, he promises me an eternal future in Sleepy Meadows retirement home, watching the clock and looking forward to the highlight of my day, the next game of dominos. I am just thrilled to death.

And yet, somehow I am having more fun than I ever have had in my entire lifetime just hanging out with him. And I am learning so much, and despite being so blunt, there is no doubt in my mind that he accepts me as I am and really cares, and my yard is growing something really green for the first time since we moved into our house. And he is so stinkin’ joyful, and hopeful, and at home in his own skin, unencumbered with all the crap I am dealing with, as if he, or what he would say, his dad, has it all under control, and it's going to be alright without sugarcoating the hard stuff. As if the worst news are actually the best news.

I wonder if somehow, somewhere some intergalactic communication wires got crossed and I need to find a line-repairman or an interpreter, or both?

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