The Secret Power of Self-Denial

I didn’t know it at the time, of course, but it was the beginning of a love affair of sorts.  Something that slowly morphed into a secret obsession which made me restless towards much of my ‘old’ life, what used to occupy my thoughts, time and emotional energy; 

…what I used to love and now begun to merely put up with.

Alas, yet again, I am jumping ahead of myself….

Some may call it providence, others coincidence, but my acorn prayer was flung at the sky right around Lent that year.  

Now, I’d been a follower of Jesus for decades but never have I participated in time-honored self-negating practice of Lent.  Century after century, all around the world and all around me other people would deny themselves good things of life during this period of self-refection, remembering Christ's sacrifice and, what I perceived as self-imposed suffering. 

Not I!

Not even an inkling of desire to join in, basking in the completeness and sufficiency of what Jesus did for me … Nothing to add, nothing to take away...

But for some inexplicable reason, almost on a whim, a thought crossed my mind that perhaps it’s about time for me to be nice to God and even give him something...

Something I really liked.  Something I really enjoy.  Something that would represent sacrifice for me to give up.

At the time, I didn't even think about whether God would like it or not, but that's an altogether different story....

The first thing that popped inside my head was,

Facebook?

Facebook?!!!??? NOT FACEBOOK!!!! I  protested in anguish.

But, in that instant I knew that during my first Lent I will be fasting from my favorite social media platform.

I haven’t even begun, and I was already miserable.